I was having fun coloring dragons with fluorescent pencils when Greg came into the room. He looked stressed.
– My sister is disputing my mom’s will, – there was bitterness in his voice
– What are you gonna do?
– I will give her what she wants and will never talk to her again.
– Talk to your lawyer
– No, Vixen.
– Really? – I put the pencils aside and raised my head from the coloring book.
– I am not going to court, hon.
– Court is not be necessary, there are ways out. You may settle it through mediation. Have your lawyer deal with it.
– I said, NO.
– And you are ready to cut ties with your only sibling without even trying to negotiate?
– Absolutely, – Greg was mercilessly rigid. Talking to him felt like talking to a wall.
– I will fix you dinner, – his attitude caught me off guard. My motivation to proceed with coloring was gone.
I went into the kitchen and stood frozen in front of the refrigerator trying to gather my thoughts and figure out ingredients for potato salad.
Clearly, we all act weird, we make irrational decisions, and run away trying to escape problems.
We are just people who do everything possible and impossible to save the pride at any cost.
Criticized at work? – Quitting
Caught your partner with someone else? – Permanent separation or divorce
Struggles at school? – Immediate withdrawal
Facing own problems with the bitter understanding that we are powerless to fix them is sometimes harder than surviving a hurricane. The pain from the hurt ego is thousand times worse than passing kidney stones. Those who decide to fight own demons lose themselves in the endless battle with personal fears, phobias, and traumas.
You can rarely see someone that quietly accepts this life without hysterical fight or flight attempts. Someone who does nothing about life kicks, allowing chaos to settle and conflicts to resolve. Someone who turns the mind off and floats through the reality curiously observing emerging and disappearing events, people, and problems.
Most people think that going with a flow is passive and lazy. They would rather fear or suffer than let things take care of themselves. People are used to acting, resisting, and escaping. People are used to perceiving life as the never-ending struggle with pain, winners, and victims. Living in the permanent hysteria of moving, searching, and burning bridges is the only way for most of us to exist. Common sense is not that common.
I suddenly felt Greg was standing behind me and turned around.
– Don’t bother, luv. I’ve ordered Chinese food and talked to my attorney. He will contact my sister on Monday about the will.
I gave him a smile. I felt relieved from cooking and cleaning and ready to resume coloring my dragons.